Comments on: There’s something I missed… http://hatchling.wordpress.com/2008/05/15/theres-something-i-missed/ adventures in lesbian conception... Tue, 27 Oct 2009 17:52:50 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: hatchling http://hatchling.wordpress.com/2008/05/15/theres-something-i-missed/#comment-9 hatchling Fri, 16 May 2008 10:28:57 +0000 http://hatchling.wordpress.com/?p=15#comment-9 That's a good question. We had thought about leaving it until we conceived, or even reached the second trimester, just like hetero folk do, but I worry that six months is just not enough time for them to do the emotional processing they will probably need to. And that if I am pregnant, and tired, and feeling emotionally vulnerable, I probably won't be in the best place to have those conversations. On the other hand, it will be a done deal and there would be no attempts to convince us not. We have felt that given we've been so purposive about how we're going about it, it would be a bit deceptive to not mention, so I think we would like to tell our parents in advance but not our siblings. Homophobia stuff aside, we actually have a very good relationship with both our parents (mostly). I'd like to at least give them a heads-up, so that it doesn't come as a complete surprise. And given that I live 3905kms away from my family, it would just be too easy to procrastinate about telling until it was too late... But we'll se how it goes :) That’s a good question. We had thought about leaving it until we conceived, or even reached the second trimester, just like hetero folk do, but I worry that six months is just not enough time for them to do the emotional processing they will probably need to. And that if I am pregnant, and tired, and feeling emotionally vulnerable, I probably won’t be in the best place to have those conversations. On the other hand, it will be a done deal and there would be no attempts to convince us not. We have felt that given we’ve been so purposive about how we’re going about it, it would be a bit deceptive to not mention, so I think we would like to tell our parents in advance but not our siblings. Homophobia stuff aside, we actually have a very good relationship with both our parents (mostly). I’d like to at least give them a heads-up, so that it doesn’t come as a complete surprise. And given that I live 3905kms away from my family, it would just be too easy to procrastinate about telling until it was too late… But we’ll se how it goes :)

]]> By: Clark http://hatchling.wordpress.com/2008/05/15/theres-something-i-missed/#comment-8 Clark Thu, 15 May 2008 23:23:23 +0000 http://hatchling.wordpress.com/?p=15#comment-8 This is such a tough one! Many of us go through similar things with family reaction. Thankfully, mine have taken it all rather well. A question though... are you sure you want to speak to them about it before you start trying? TTC is an incredibly stressful journey and you really need the support of everyone who knows about it. And as you know, it may take a long time - can you deal with constant - 'are you pg yet' questions? If you think that they will provide much needed support for the process, then you should definitely talk to them about it. But that really doesn't seem like a given. We chose not to tell about TTC - we didn't tell any family until we were already pregnant. I'm 19 weeks now and lazyboo's family still doesn't know! But that's a whole other story... This is such a tough one! Many of us go through similar things with family reaction. Thankfully, mine have taken it all rather well.

A question though… are you sure you want to speak to them about it before you start trying? TTC is an incredibly stressful journey and you really need the support of everyone who knows about it. And as you know, it may take a long time – can you deal with constant – ‘are you pg yet’ questions?

If you think that they will provide much needed support for the process, then you should definitely talk to them about it. But that really doesn’t seem like a given.

We chose not to tell about TTC – we didn’t tell any family until we were already pregnant. I’m 19 weeks now and lazyboo’s family still doesn’t know! But that’s a whole other story…

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